Whether you are famous or not, one thing remains true – marriage is work. Sure, some things might be a bit easier with fame and fortune but there are also unique challenges as well. Hollywood relationships are well-known for their short lifespan so it’s always interesting to hear how some people manage to make it work.
In a recent interview with InStyle magazine, Jennifer Garner opened up about how her relationship has changed since she married Ben Affleck nine years ago. With three children – Violet, 8, Seraphina, 5 and Samuel, 2 – vying for attention, it can be really hard to find time for anything but childrearing.
She explained that her expectations are different now and said: “you can’t expect to be courted all the time, and I don’t want to court him right now – I don’t have the energy! But we’re definitely in a very mindful place where we’re making an effort to be together, do things at the same time, and be loving.”
Like many of us, she feels like becoming a mother of three happened overnight. She said: “when we had our first we had only been together a year. We were babies. It happened so fast, I hardly remember what we were like before the kids got here. Now we’re just starting to go away for a night here and there.”
How many of us can relate to trying to have those stolen moments where you basically have to escape your home in order to enjoy some rest and relaxation? There’s something comforting in knowing that even people who walk the red carpet know exactly how that feels. Not every Hollywood family relies heavily on nannies.
One of the more interesting things she said pertained to the roles that she and Affleck fill in their household. While many women might complain about this all-too-common division of labor, Garner chooses to see the silver lining. She explained: “I know who wants what lunch, and I’ve done all the school paperwork and filled out the emergency cards. Ben doesn’t know that stuff exists. He is in charge of laughter. No matter how much I tickle them or toss them or chase them around it’s not the same. If I’m the slow, steady drumbeat, he’s the jazz.”
That’s definitely one way to look at it rather than feeling resentful for not being able to be the “fun parent.” Instead, Garner accepts that they each play a role in their children’s lives and they are both important.
How do you feel about what she had to say? Is it fair that things are divided in that way?